You have too much tinsel
And too many lights
Joy to the world
But only tuesday nights

Santa Claus clashes
With my new paint
It might have passed
If it came off quaint

Unhappy Holidays
Now keep it down
That star would shine better
In mute shades of brown

All the neighbors
On this street agree
You are banished
By our decree

We won’t smile at you
Or stop to pet your dog
But we still expect
A glass of your egg nog

Unhappy Holidays
Stop with the bells
If you’re spreading cheer
Do it somewhere else

Your tree is too gaudy
Your cheer is too loud
We’ve an image to maintain
And you’re drawing a crowd

What’s with the carolers
Talk about a noise
What’s a Jewish boy
Got to do with toys